Monday, November 30, 2009

We try and we try, but we fail.

Failure isn't an option they say.

But in these past few months, I've experienced failure after failure. EPIC FAIL as the interwebs coined it. No, I didn't fail any subjects, in fact I'm doing average in uni and it's expected to stay that way. Life, that's where I generally fail. Relationships, another downer. Social life, oh, I don't have that.

It's not fun anymore. I don't know if it's the inferiority complex or life in general. And no, I am not going to cut or kill myself.

I am yet into another dysfunctional relationship. I am with the most amazing person there ever is and yet I fail to see what that person does for me. I am so grateful that Bam loved me the way I am despite me looking like a complete mess; picked me up the time my past threw me away and shattered me into tiny pieces. But the thing is, I haven't forgotten about my past yet. It's heartbreaking that I am hurting somebody else while I wallow in pain.

I'd like to run away, and take long bus trips to nowhere and fade into oblivion. Is that too much to ask?


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